Thursday, December 07, 2006


Dear God

I need a job. No not any job, something dignified and easy and purpose built, thats going to land in my lap and involve just being me, and lots of cash.
I need it so that I can buy half the beauty treatments that city women of my age shell out for - less than a tenth of whats been done to Madonna and the like over the years, I would guess. I don't even want a personal trainer, honestly.
Just a little bit of underpinning.
A little shoring up.
A teensy refurb.
A miracle or two, especially around the eyes.
See, I need these things because its winter and I've gone pale and the lines and shadows are more pronounced and I'm getting older and it shows. I need them because I look in the mirror and I see Dali's clocks. It feels like its too late. It feels like I blew it good and proper when I wasnt even looking. Probably when I was separating warring kids, or clearing up cat vomit, or somesuch.

Please don't make me look at my time so far and judge which bits were a waste.

Dear God,
I just need a temporary life. Just enough of one to pay for what it takes to fool myself that I've still got plenty of time to go find a real one.

Oh Shit.


Blogger nlocco said...

Dear Cheryl,

If you dont hear from me in 2 weeks, consider your application ...


8:49 PM  
Blogger Stegbeetle said...

Cheryl, if you find such a job and decide you need a PA - I can type, scrub up well and make a half-decent cuppa!

12:33 AM  
Blogger Cheryl said...

Steg - you get better than that - you get the Grand Prize (big bowl of buggerall, as my son would say) for having a similar sense of furious humour.
It means loads.

8:00 AM  
Blogger annie said...

poignant, yet funny stuff.
best wishes.
i relate.

12:10 PM  
Blogger Miss Cellania said...

Boy, can I relate to that!

I would settle for a job thats less than perfect, though. Since I don't have one now!

2:18 PM  
Blogger fineartist said...

You’ve put it out there, tongue in cheek and funny as hell, but it’s out there in the universe now, so that job may just fall right into your lap.

The thing that bothers me is that we, mostly chicks, have the responsibility of taking care of home and work. See that’s where we have screwed up royally, we are all things to all people, and when we get a job we still have to be all things to all the people in our home and we also get to tap dance around at work too.

Unless we have a partner who shares in the responsibilities, but they usually call it helping US do OUR jobs. That really gripes me.

Dali’s clocks, heh, heh, me too, me too. The time is ticking and the face is sliding right off the bones. You know though, I really like what aging does to reveal bone structure, speaking purely from an artistic point of view, I could, however, do without my jowls and deep crevices though.

I’ll tell you a secret beauty tip my grandma gave to me and my sisters when she was very sick and sort of speaking out of her butt, she said, “Girls, every night before you go to bed, wash your face and slather a big ol’ glop of Vaseline on it. Vaseline is the best moisturizer on God’s earth.”

Granny said it, and I believe it. I use the shit out of that stuff and it’s way cheap too, right on….

And water, lots of water, it really is the fountin of youth; good for the complextion, and to rehydrate from within.

12:19 AM  
Blogger beckyboop said...

I've recently had some things rebuilt, but I need an entire overhaul.

1:14 AM  

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